I recently started EMDR therapy. I am never shy about sharing that I go to a therapist...just for LIFE. I like being happy. And one way to stay happy is to take anti-depression medications. Another way, which has been scientifically proven to equal the same reactions and success rate as depression meds, is talk therapy. So I go for the med-free path. But I do NOT say everyone should be avoiding meds, if it will save your life: take the pills. But my most recent experience with my therapist has been SO INTERESTING.
We started EMDR. And it gently, subtly and dramatically brings up weaknesses manifesting in the body, dealing with old pain and ancient hurt that is HOLDING YOU BACK. I feel like a whole, brand new woman since my first experience with it.
I held two vibrating discs in my hands, one in each. And I had ear phones on my head that were taking turns making soft tones in my left, then right ear, back and forth and back and forth. This works on balancing the left and right hemispheres of the brain, thus bringing balance, somehow to your past, present and future mind and body. My therapist had me envisioning positive images, personal to me. Then he had me talk through whatever "came up" or came to mind as my hands and ears buzzed back and forth.
I am going back for more. I was freaking out crying toward the end and he made me feel safe and warm, healed and happy. I have no idea what happened, but I LOVED it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And I feel like a leaner, healthier, calmer and more patient woman and Mom ever since. Learn more here, I highly recommend it, if you can find a really good, well-trained EMDR therapist in your area: http://www.emdr.com/general-information/what-is-emdr/what-is-emdr.html
I get asked which I prefer more, quite often, between Focus T25 and P90X3.
Here's the skinny, no pun intended....
T25 is probably my favorite program right now, as far as mindless, easy, anyone can do-exercise/fitness/movement. The modifications cater to TRULY ANYONE, at any fitness level. So I recommend it most often, lately, because it is great for beginners as well as more advanced people who need to be pushed. The multiple levels of options in each move are the best Beachbody has offered to date. PLUS, the programs are each 25 minutes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That is STUPID easy for ANYONE to fit in. Cardio makes us lean, this is a fact. And it is good for your heart! No brainer there. But different than Shaun T's Insanity workout program, it does not at all beat your joints up or leave you crying for Mother Mary. I find it WAY, WAY more enjoyable. Plus the addition of free weights in month 2 make it something that really speaks to me. I love synergistic exercise, LOVE IT (exercise where you move multiple body parts at once, like doing a lunge with the legs and curl with the arms/free weights at the same time-I love moving in that way).
As for P90X3, I have done that as well. And Tony Horton IS. THE. MAN. Seriously. Anyone who loves and respects Yoga as much as he, has GOT to have his mind super squared away, in my opinion. I did T25 when I was moving, stressed out, deploying husband, had NO TIME and it provided, quick, mindless, effective workouts for an extremely busy lifestyle. It worked really well for me. But when it is time to take your life and totally resurrect your wellness and health, then P90X3 is the PERFECT place to start. You will NEVER get bored with this program. You will be jumping lightly, moving like a speed skater, doing Pilates, Yoga and pull ups with a bar or band, whichever your body or home accommodates. The equipment is minimal and fun. You work each and every muscle group in your body in a million different ways. Blocks one and two are SUPER easy compared to the 1st version of P90X and block 3 is where the massive results seem to happen for most people (so you CANNOT quit or you will be disappointed, but who likes a quitter anyway?). The modifications are not quite as obvious in this program as they are in T25, but I can help you make that better if you are a beginner, or plug into a good coach who will help you there. I recommend it because it is Beachbody and ANYTHING they make is worth the money and comes with a free coach. These workouts are 30 minutes and I preferred following the "Lean" version, but you have 3 options/versions to best choose from for your particular body type. So the amazing options are endless. This is definitely a good one to have in a life long video library and always have on hand to own.
In both the programs, the meal planners are extremely decent. I will leave it at that. But again, working with an experienced coach is where your success will lie in this department. To sum it all up, just get moving. Your body will LOVE you for it. "Do your best and forget the rest." FOR REAL. Please contact me for more info, if you want to talk about it further HERE is to your ever-improving health and fitness!!!!!!!!
XOXOX, Good vibes and high fives, Coach Becca Sweeney
The best side dish that I EVER tried is this one below, Coconut Collard Greens. I make it along side grass fed beef, or fish or chicken! OR, if i am feeling just a super light dinner after a heavy lunch or something, sometimes this is all I will make for dinner. It is delicious and I cannot believe I have never tried collard greens until I was in my 30's. Amazingness, super yummy recipe below!!!
I swear I really do NOT like to cook. But food is essential to the healthy body, mind and life. So I dove into nutrition studies, cleanses and food seasonings over the past couple years. It is serving me well -even though honestly I am not one of those women who loves to be in the kitchen. I do it because I have to. I do it for me and for my kiddos BEST health.
Make this soup. Don't judge it before you try it. It is oddly simple and miraculously delicious. I got this recipe from the Beachbody Ultimate Reset Cleanse. I make this recipe at least once a week. I like things that are 5 ingredients or less. Bam. Boo ya.
Hit me up with questions! Enjoy!
Who likes to be all doom and gloom? Why focus on the past?
I sure as heck don't.
But I am writing this blog post today for all the kids who are now, and adults who were once: BULLIED. It is an important subject matter that has come up more and more in recent years and we NEED to keep talking about it and squash it once and for all.
I spent from Kindergarten until about tenth grade being bullied by a girl in my school. For a super long time I didn't really say anything about it. Then I became an adult who joined facebook. Then I started connecting with people who knew me then and who knew HER. I told a very select, few and somewhat trusted friends how my life was "back then." And I am not sure anyone will ever fully understand the pain and anguish and constant struggle I went through all of my life until about the age of 16 or 17 years.
It started when we were very young. She screamed at me one day on the play ground, "I don't know why I don't like you Becca, but I JUST DON'T LIKE YOU." I stood alone, with her and a group of our friends all standing behind her. After she was done screaming at me she and all our classmates turned their backs on me and they all walked away as I was standing there sobbing and gasping for breath.
Then as elementary school progressed she continued to try and steal friends from me. She continued doing all sorts of insulting, lying and sneaking in a multitude of ways all to get me to be taken down however her sick little mind could make it happen. I struggled with it silently and just went to school every single day dreading the thought of her and class and kids making fun of me for whatever it was she had started that season.
But it all started to get really real when my elementary school was about to join with 4 other elementary schools, all the 6th graders coming into one middle school for 7th grade. My bully jumped all over the opportunity to ruin my life one more time.
We had a mixer at a school gym so all the 6th grade kids from all the different schools could start to meet and get to know one another. I will never forget that day. She moved her way through the crowds of people and whispered to everyone from every school, "do you see that girl over there? Her name is Becca. She is a slut, a bitch and a total snob." I knew those were her exact words because people told me what she said.
There I was, a new 7th grader in a school where everyone hated me. I still stayed silent and hid within my own mind and skin. I just existed. My Mom started noticing I was not acting happy or balanced. So she asked me what was up. I told her what my bully had done with all the new kids and schools coming together. Mom was livid. So Mom went to my high school/middle school counselors and requested that this girl and I NEVER be placed in the same classroom for any reason, ever again until after I graduated high school. They did it. But that didn't change a whole lot.
For the rest of high school, I would slowly but surely get to know people and I wish I had a penny for every time someone said to me, "Wow, Becca, you are pretty nice, do you know what I used to think of you? And I'm not sure why?" "Let me guess," I would say, "you thought I was a bitch, snob, slut take your pick, right?" Yea! They would retort. They couldn't even recall why they would think that. But they all did. I had to live down QUITE a reputation.
I started believing the lies at one point. I used to prefer hanging out with boys more than girls. Gee, I wonder why? And so some people interpreted that as me being "slutty." And so I think the belief that I was a slut or loose or something, actually became ingrained in my developing brain. My quiet, meek and scared nature translated to people as though I was a snob. And I straight up started abusing MYSELF in high school. The lack of self-esteem simply seeped through my veins and I found myself in the crowds of kids who drank, smoked and did drugs. Who cares anyway? I hated myself and everyone else hated me too, so I thought.
This went on and on and on until 10th or 11th grade at which point I just totally stopped caring about anything or anyone. I had a long term boyfriend from another school and I just hung out with him. Summers were lonely. I got not one phone call from not one friend. I just stayed lonely and pathetic. I let this GIRL ruin my entire life. I had a few really awesome girlfriends from a school grade ahead of me who were my only friends and saving grace at all. They didn't care or know about the crowds of people who all had certain feelings and believed certain rumors about me. Thank God for them.
But when I left for college, it was my time to shine. I left that girl, that BULLY who was nothing and no one to me any more, behind. She was gone from my mind FOREVER. It was time to start over and create a new, better, amazing Becca.
Fast forward to the age of 34. I felt like I had dealt with my painful childhood. I felt like I had shed that bully who plagued my entire youth. And I post my before and after fitness photos on facebook because now I am the person who is DEVOTED to helping others take BACK their life and their strength, no matter where they came from. And a guy from my high school actually makes a comment on one of my photos about me bragging about looking "hot on facebook" and doesn't my husband ever get annoyed by it. AND BAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That triggered a response in me that was so great, so large and so OLD I was taken right back to the bully.
The old rumors of "You are a slut" came right back into my core belief system.
I know I am not a slut. But my cells and nerves started developing and believing what people were sometimes saying about me all from this bully and her circle of screwed up followers who spread hatred throughout my high school like a virus.
So I still work on it until this very day. I have blessed her and released her. I feel really sorry for her actually. I have no idea where she is as an adult to this day. I don't really care. I bet you she has an equal if not MORE amount of work to do on herself than I do. I am quite sure the BULLY has more demons and things to work out than the BULLIED.
The point of this blog? I want to bring some awareness to the subject. I want to talk about how like 20 years later I am still trying to heal my pain. And that is OK. I just like to open up to people who come to my web site. I want to let people know I am real. I feel. I struggle. I hurt. And maybe that is why I am such a big fighter to this day, so maybe I should even be THANKING this old bully of a lost soul of a poor girl. Because I feel pretty bad ass after all.
Look, we all screw up in different ways in high school or elementary school. It is part of growing up and learning. I am sure I did somethings I wish I could take back. But it was never anything that gave any reason for anyone to be treated the way I was for so long. It was so psychologically SICK. I want to open this dialog and conversation. Many of us now have school age kids of our own now. Can we break this cycle? Please send me your opinions.
Life Changing. The end. I cannot go on enough. Just watch my video blog below to get my full thoughts! I am always here to help you, if you decide this cleanse is for you too! I cannot say enough good things. So happy I did this....again. I fully intend to do this cleanse every year in September, for the rest of my life. Click here for more info!
These were my final day pictures from the new Beachbody program Focus T25. The camera did not get a really clear shot because, I was moving and used my phone timer to take the shots. Which brings me to my first point. MOVING. It is no secret. I LOATHE moving. Yes. I am a military wife too. Yes. Cruel irony. I know. But it seriously stresses me out. I get pathetic, drink, eat doughnuts, the whole nine yards. But I achieved doing nearly 100% of the new program T25 all while preparing my husband for deployment. Scheduling a move out of our town house in Augusta, to shopping for a new home three hours south in Georgia. Went through a home purchase process. Scheduled a move in (desperately scraping by to get us in before HE deployed). Got moved. Stayed in hotels. Started to unpack. Scheduled the kids in two new schools. On and on and on and on. All within about a month and half time period. And I committed to trying desperately to stay fit through it all. But all I could possible give was that 25 minutes a day. I knew I would do the program because I could talk myself out of being too busy to go for a run or do a 30 minute, 45 or 60 minute workout. But not 25 minutes. I could not talk myself out of that. So I did it. But I did not really expect results of any kind.
MIND OFFICIALLY BLOWN!!!~
I didn't take measurements or before photos. I was too busy! But I can honestly say, that I did NOT follow the meal plan. We ate on the road! I did not always get the double workout day in that falls on Fridays. I did not. AND STILL....I was SO HAPPY with my progress and final day photos. THIS. IS. THE. BEST. PROGRAM. I HAVE FOUND: For busy, busy Moms, military wives, people with hectic work schedules, etc. Look NO FURTHER. Please contact me if you have questions about it. I will talk to you all day about it! ANYONE can do this program. Beginners, people who have just had a baby, 100+ lbs over weight. ANYONE. I can help you through it and this program offers awesome modifications and low to NO impact for every body. (firstname.lastname@example.org if you have questions to ask me about it) I am SO STOKED. I love that I have this solution in my life. I LOVE the results I did get! Between this and the cleanse I am on, I KNOW I have finally found ALL the tools I need to maintain my perfect balance, body, health and life. Stick a fork in me! I AM DONE and psyched!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Check out my video below about it and where I am at now:
Don't blink! You might have missed my first drink. For those who don't know, I stopped drinking for a really long time. Sobriety for me totaled over seven months and I found it to be the most enlightening experience EVER. I even wrote a book about it (shameless plug), in case you didn't know.
I hesitated to share my first drink (since all of that) publicly for those might be looking to me for inspiration and support and reasons to keep on staying sober themselves. But I never wrote the book for recovering addicts in the first place. Did addicts get something from it? I am not sure. I hope so. I know a few who have purchased the book. But again, I did not write it for the people out there who feel like they cannot make it in life without professional help. I sort of wrote it for everyone else. Everyone who drinks, doesn't really interfere with their life. But there is a grey area for them and feel alcohol doesn't really serve them a whole lot, they don't really feel a dependency to it, but also they cannot really say "NO." That was me, that was who the book was for. And the book was also for anyone else who got anything at all out of it.
So I had another drink! Yup. After 7 months. Why start again? Because I knew it wasn't ever going to be a life style for me ever again. Because I wanted to observe what happened to me with it. And also because my husband was leaving for war and he wanted to have a drink with me. I thought, well, really I am making a conscious decision to do this FOR him. (should he have wanted me to drink? Well THAT is another blog) But he was leaving, and when they leave you are not sure if they are ever coming back. Why would you not want to be totally present and sober for those last days? THAT is another blog too. Our relationship is a really complicated one. We have had some troubles. And I will admit that I thought joining him at his level of consciousness that night might have been an ok thing to do. He absolutely loves drinking and had to say goodbye to it for a year. So I said goodbye to it with him.
Turns out it wasn't that good. I felt nothing from the wine we chose. It made me feel sluggish and not really happy. I have also noticed since then, I have had different wines and drinks here and there that make me feel deliriously happy. Perhaps it is the mood we are in, or the mood of those around us when we drink that effects how we feel? Perhaps it is the food we have eaten or not eaten that day? I am sure it is endless factors that contribute. But my first time back at drinking, I decided to stay conscious. I did not have that many drinks. I think I had two. And I chose to drink wine with my parents when they came to visit and one or two other times as well over the past two months. Each time felt different. Each time I stayed conscious and present and decided to stop before I got too crazy with it. And each morning after, I didn't feel hung over, I just felt sluggish and slightly depressed. So I learned and re-learned what I already knew. Sometimes alcohol brings joy and celebration, sort of, but more often it brings despair and a snow ball effect of bad decisions and slumping energy. I found myself not getting out of bed as easy since I was sober. I found myself slowly gaining weight back on, yes, even with just a few days of drinking sporadically. When I abstained from alcohol following after a night of drinking a couple, the days since the drinking felt better and better each day without the alcohol. Nothing I didn't already know.
But the best news to me was, after welcoming alcohol back into my life for a brief moment, I got really excited about giving it up again! I am eagerly planning my 21 day cleanse I do every September. I start tomorrow and I cannot wait! So I realized in these past two months, that I have forever changed my life when I took that fateful seven month sabbatical with sobriety. I recommend EVERYONE take at least 6 months, if not a year off of drinking in their life, if they don't already abstain from alcohol....and I DON'T mean for pregnancy. I mean regular old, being sober for YOURSELF. It is a wonderful time to reflect, be clear, clean, journal and give your health a super duper gift.
My seven months did change me forever. I am SO READY to cleanse now. I am so excited to lose the last ten pounds I have to lose. I hit a weight loss plateau last year in my fitness and weight loss journey. I knew it was all food-related. A cleanse gets me back on the right track in so many ways. The Ultimate Reset Cleanse broke that plateau that I thought would NEVER be broken. It is the safest, finest cleanse on the market. That weight has nearly all stayed off, but I am not yet quite at my goal weight still. I am sure I will get there with this second round of cleansing. And I plan to do this cleanse yearly. So exciting.
Aside from the alcohol lately, I know my diet has been less than desirable. I have gone through some serious, dramatic stress. And I am not a perfect health and diet nutritionist guru. I lean on food and alcohol (used to) when I feel stress. I know this. And I get better and better as the years go by. I keep my goals in mind and go easy on myself when I stumble. So the cookies and cheat meals have happened a little more often than I would like to admit. But I am human! And man this stress has been real. But I know this is not the authentic ME, to cheat this much. So I am rectifying it! Join me cleansing!!! It is the second best gift you can give to your life and human experience! I have an incredible, free, private support group for it. Let me know if you want in. And thanks no matter what for reading and following along with my journey. I hope to inspire many to take care of their ONE life they are given.
Good vibes and high fives, Coach Becca
One of my cheat meals or PRE-tox splurges recently from a local Italian delivery joint. Totally worth it. But at the same time, making me feel sluggish and dragged down and that 'aint cool. I am over it....again :)
Thank you so much for visiting my blog! I love to connect with people, so please comment and email me and talk with me about anything I have written that might have spoken to you!